Happy Birthday, Ernie!

How well do you know Ernie? Take the special "Ernie Birthday Quiz" and find out!

1. For our family, our first promise of Ernie came as:

a. A bright blue stuffed poodle in a garbage bag
b. A card
c. A gift certificate
d. A singing telegram

2. Ernie was born in:

a. Portland, Oregon
b. Molalla, Oregon
c. The maternity ward
d. A garbage bag

3. Which was true of Ernie-the-puppy when we got him home?
a. He was so tiny, he couldn’t climb the stairs
b. He was already paper-trained
c. He stood on the grass for the first time
d. All of the above

4. True or false: Ernie has American Kennel Club pedigree credentials:

a. True
b. False

5. Ernie could have earned commercial fame marketing this product:

a. Doggie downers
b. Pedigree dog food
c. Fido Fleece
d. Milk Bone dog biscuits

6. Something Ernie would rather you didn’t know is his lust for:

a. Eating toenail trimmings
b. Doing annoying things with used underwear
c. Peeing on plastic bags
d. All of the above

7. Ernie eats this food every day:

a. IAMS Eukanuba
b. Purina Dog Chow
c. Healthy Choice dog food
d. Science Diet

8. Ernie’s all-time favorite dog toy:

a. The Hedgehog
b. The squeaky cheeseburger
c. The rubber nun
d. Nuts the Squirrel

9. Most of Ernie’s scrapes with death have been caused by:

a. Viruses
b. Falling from heights
c. Chocolate
d. Doing annoying things with used underwear

10. Which three dogs, in which order, are most intelligent?

a. Border collie, poodle, German shepherd
b. Cocker spaniel, Irish setter, golden retriever (yeah, right!)
c. Poodle, border collie, Scottish terrier
d. Dachshund, poodle, border collie

11. Ernie probably saved Erin’s life by doing this:

a. Barking for help when she fell down the stairs
b. Treeing a full-grown black bear that had come up behind her when we were camping
c. Getting her off the streets and into college
d. Convincing her to make the piano her life

12. Which of these human foods would Ernie choose not to eat:

a. Sushi
b. Hot and sour soup
c. Oatmeal with raisins
d. Crab pasta

13. How old is Ernie today?

a. 14
b. 15.
c. 16
d. 17

14. When confronted with a strong smell, Ernie does this:

a. Smiles
b. Growls
c. Licks his chops
d. Bites

15. If you try to touch Ernie’s feet, he does this:

a. Smiles
b. Growls
c. Licks his chops
d. Bites

16. True or false: Ernie once chewed up the hand of a would-be burglar badly enough to require an emergency room visit:

a. True
b. False

17. When Ernie travels in a car, how does he behave?

a. He curls up and goes to sleep
b. He whines and paces continuously
c. He tries to jump into the front seat
d. He bites whoever is sitting next to him

18. Who is Ernie’s Alpha?

a. Erin
b. Mommy
c. Bill
d. The cat next door

19. Ernie invariably barks at:

a. Cats
b. Men with beards
c. Pregnant women
d. A and B

20. Last but not least, what totemic Ernie-icon occupies a high place in the living room:

a. A basket of select dog toys
b. A dog bed
c. A 5 x 7 portrait of Ernie
d. A poodle skeleton

Answers tomorrow!